A Slice of Dread for Breakfast

March 18, 2020

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Winnie the Pooh said, “My spelling is wobbly; it’s good spelling but it wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places.

Teachers encounter letters in wrong places on tests and assignments. Here are seven classics from kids.

  1. “I didn’t get to sleep much all night because next doors dog was baking.” Well, that kid had a ruff night, don’t you think? A dog baking? Paws and think about it. Sounds like a dog’s breakfast to me. My friend Mike has a chubby little puppy. He likes to say, “He’s not fat, he’s just a little husky.”
  2. “There are two houses of parliament in Britain. The House of Commons. And the House of Lards.”
  3. “There was a very thick frog on the road last night and it made a car crash into a bus.” Ah yes, watch out for those very thick frogs.
  4. “In last year’s Christmas concert, Linzi played the small prat. I played one of the smaller prats and I would like to have a bigger prat this year.”
  5. “I like to pick up smells on the beach and keep them in my room.” I hope he meant shells.
  6. “The funny thing about my family is that they are divers. My uncle Tim is a taxi diver. My uncle Steve is a bus diver and my Dad is a van diver.” Well diving jokes are shrimply great, aren’t they?
  7. “Every morning dad has a slice of dread before he goes to work.”

He’s not alone. This morning I too picked up a slice of dread. Over family concerns. Decisions. A relationship that needs mending. If you’ve picked up a thick slice of dread today, would you do this?

Allow the arrival of worry to trigger an acknowledgement of your own inadequacy and your need to turn it over to God. There is no situation or circumstance that we face alone. Proverbs 15:3 says, “The eyes of the Lord are in every place…” He is with us. He cares.

Learn to preach to yourself this way: “God is strong enough to carry this for me, big enough to bring me through this, and loving enough to cause it all to work together for good.

It will be alright in the end. If it’s not alright, I guess it’s not the end.

I hope that brings you a smile today. And if you’re driving, watch out for that thick frog on the road. I don’t want you to croak.

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